Mike leach wearing sec logo and mississippi state bulldogs logo shirt

 

Mike leach wearing sec logo and mississippi state bulldogs logo shirt

At 19 I moved out my parents house, and lived on my own. At least I stopped wanting to be dead, but if I had died.. I really wouldn’t have minded. As I continued live on my own, and had gotten so fat that a few people had made comments. My ex boyfriend (gees, the Mike leach wearing sec logo and mississippi state bulldogs logo shirt Furthermore, I will do this people you date when you have low esteem, ahhh…how embarrassing) asked if I wanted to sleep with him and I lashed out. He laughed and said I was fat anyway. That was sobering, I decided I needed to lose weight. I went from 145lb to 105 in less than a year, and suddenly I was glad to be alive. My eating disorder was strong, as my addiction to caffeine pills and laxatives. I did many things to stay thin. I still had a bad personality. I tied my happiness directly to my looks. If I wasn’t beautiful, I wasn’t worth anything…and I was rediculously beautiful. Turning down men weekly, made me feel strong and desired. Muhahhaa, I made them feel bad about themselves. It was awesome. I would stare at myself for hours, and just be like..damn..there wasn’t a mirror I didn’t like. Unfortunately, I also learned after trial and error that men were something to be afraid of. People started talking to me more, people would do things for me, I got more girlfriends, work was more lenient with me.. and if I got ugly again I would lose it all.

Mike leach wearing sec logo and mississippi state bulldogs logo shirt

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